Want greater impact? Grow as a "talent wielder"
Our talents can be deployed for the greatest good or harm - the path of excellence calls us to samurai like skill in their use
25 years later and I still am not sure if I meant to make her cry or if that was just the net effect.
The biggest project of my senior year of high school was the drafting and defense of a thesis. My classmates and I each selected a topic of interest, conducted research, drafted a paper, and gave an oral defense.
The defense included time for questions from the audience. In hindsight, a potential problem.
It was in that window, I asked my classmate a number of challenging questions. She handled them well, but quickly after leaving the stage, burst into tears.
I felt horrible - and still do.
I don’t believe my intent was harm - but I can't be sure.
4 years later - senior year of college - a similar setup. In my capstone course for my business degree, each group had to present an entrepreneurial business idea and comprehensive business plan. Some classmates presented their idea, and I asked a bunch of questions.
But rather than allow the questions to knock the presenting team off course, the wise professor stepped in and said, "And that is why, you all will want someone like David on your Board someday."
A tremendous gift. It reaffirmed the quality of the presentation - but was an unexpected gift to me.
Similar circumstances, similar action - different effect.
Every person on earth has talents that make them uniquely great. The great diversity of these talents is part of what makes life wonderful. Much can be written about how to develop talent.
Instead, I want to consider how we wield our talents.
Wield is the right word. A sword in the hand of a knight can be used for great destruction or in pursuit of great ends. A skilled painter knows which brush is required to create the right effect. A great fighter knows exactly which punch to throw.
In the physical world, wielding talent feels more straightforward. I don't think Tiger Woods has much existential uncertainty when he steps up to a golf ball. Nor does John Mayer when he pulls out a guitar.
But what if your skills are qualitative - as they most likely are?
If you are excellent at being empathetic - how do you know and choose when to be a listening ear or a shoulder to cry or when that friend needs a kick in the pants?
Or in my case, when can an ability to question be used to build up or tear down?
Learning how to wield your talents is what separates the master from the novice.
First - it must be about a higher purpose
Our talents must be in pursuit of something greater than ourselves. This deeper meaning delivers a sense of transcendence we naturally desire. As well, it begins to reduce the impact of ego. It is action in service of something.
Instead, when ego drives our actions - our talents become something we inflicted upon others, rather than use to bring blessing.
Second - we must be self-aware
Self-awareness takes two forms. First, we must wrestle with our own baggage that holds back from utilizing our talents to the fullest. For example, if you do not understand the root cause of your people pleasing, it will be hard to step into circumstances where you may have to disappoint someone. Even when that is the best course of action.
Self-awareness also applies in the moment. We must have cultivated the presence of mind to know what to pick up and what to put down. If we are too reactive and in the emotional flow, we will not be able to wield our talents to their greatest effect.
Third - we must know when to stop
In the making of great art, knowing when to stop is as important as when to begin. A great painting, poem, or novel can always be edited further. It is never ultimately finished. And yet, the master knows where and when to end.
When we talent wield, we must know the end point. The point of maximum effect, before damage occurs.
The world needs people to use their talents to their maximum effect. Some need to learn the art of learning - how to develop their skills to the highest level possible. But others need to master their actual use - when and how to skillfully use them for greatest effect.
When we hold back, we are robbing the people / places / organizations that we care about from reaching their potential. And in the same way, when we wield our talents carelessly, we are not the careful surgeon that may be required - but rather the brutalist of butcher - leaving destruction in our wake.